Posted 2014-June-17, 14:06
Three, actually.
The first was 7NTXX, vulnerable, -13 for -7600. I accomplished this! 1NTopening, doubled, and partner leaped to 4♦, intending this as a bizarre preempt. We had this as a bizarre asking bid, asking for strength. I had a max and answered 4NT, which she took as Blackwood and answered 5♦, which I took as asking for Aces and showed two 5NT, which she took as asking for kings and showed 1 with 6♦, which I took as Kings and answered 6NT. She panicked and bid 7♦ because of a void. I figured that this was her bid, and she is timid, so I bid 7NT. After a double, we ended up in 7NTXX on general principles. I found the line to lose all 13 tricks, however, which was not easy. I needed a lot of jettison plays, obviously, but the void helped.
The second was 6NTXX. I knew we had no play, but the opponents pulled to a seven-level non-lucrative sac.
The third was 7NTXX but making. The play involved a progressive squeeze that was the easiest ever. I ran my longest suit, headed by the Ace-King-Queen. This squeezed the doubler, who pitched in my second-longest suit. I then ran that suit, squeezing the person who pitched in my third longest suit. So, the play was to play Ace-King-Queen-Jack-x in my five-card suit, then Ace-King-Queen-x in my second longest suit, then Ace-King-10 in my third longest suit, then cash the Ace in my longest suit. The opponent was amazed by the brilliance of the line, except that it was so self-executing it was ridiculous.
"Gibberish in, gibberish out. A trial judge, three sets of lawyers, and now three appellate judges cannot agree on what this law means. And we ask police officers, prosecutors, defense lawyers, and citizens to enforce or abide by it? The legislature continues to write unreadable statutes. Gibberish should not be enforced as law."
-P.J. Painter.