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Engage with grace End of life conversation

#1 User is offline   y66 

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Posted 2009-December-06, 12:52

From http://engagewithgra...out.aspx#vision

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We make choices throughout our lives — where we want to live, what types of activities will fill our days, with whom we spend our time. These choices are often a balance between our desires and our means, but at the end of the day, they are decisions made with intent. Somehow when we get close to death, however, we stop making decisions. We get frozen in our tracks and can't talk about our preferences for end of life care.

Studies loom out there — 73% of Americans would prefer to die at home, but anywhere between 20-50% of Americans die in hospital settings. More than 80% of Californians say their loved ones “know exactly” or have a “good idea” of what their wishes would be if they were in a persistent coma, but only 50% say they've talked to them about their preferences.

But end of life experience is about a lot more than statistics. It's about all of us.

In the summer of 2008, Matt Holt (Founder of Health2.0) and Alexandra Drane (President of Eliza) met with some friends for dinner. Over their second cocktail, they got deep into conversation about these very topics. Many of us live with such intent — why do we put the end of our lives in someone else's control?  Why isn't this a conversation that people are having? How could we help start it?

The video of Alexandra Drane's family story is pretty moving: http://engagewithgra...bout.aspx#video

It seems like more people are having this conversation now. In my family, this turned out to be one of the most important conversations we ever had with our parents. Glad we had it when we did.
If you lose all hope, you can always find it again -- Richard Ford in The Sportswriter
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#2 User is offline   gwnn 

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Posted 2009-December-06, 13:13

Must be because I'm young but I have no idea what my preferences are in this area, let alone my family members'.
... and I can prove it with my usual, flawless logic.
      George Carlin
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#3 User is offline   Winstonm 

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Posted 2009-December-06, 15:06

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Studies loom out there — 73% of Americans would prefer to die at home, but anywhere between 20-50% of Americans die in hospital settings.


Sadly, few can afford the luxury of dying at home. Hospice does not provide full-time care and the vast majority of families cannot pay for 24-hour caregivers.
"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."
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#4 User is offline   Al_U_Card 

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Posted 2009-December-06, 17:36

Since our hour is unknown (for good reason).....

DNR and procuration for instances of incapacity.

Get your will in order and specify whatever the hell you want, it will make you feel a whole lot better about the prospect.

Forget the rest and enjoy.
The Grand Design, reflected in the face of Chaos...it's a fluke!
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#5 User is offline   Phil 

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Posted 2009-December-06, 19:49

There was a great 60 Minutes article on this subject a few weeks ago:

The Cost Of Dying
Hi y'all!

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